A good friend was complaining about her son the other day.

Did you notice, she started, how he didnt wait for me to get my salad before he dove into his?

True enough, the teenager attacked his plate faster than a feral cat. If he knew how to growl, he would have done it.

Without manners, were no more than animals...

Actually, thats not true. Ive been observing and feeding a colony of feral cats, and they show unusual politeness and consideration toward each other. When food is scarce, they take turns, leaving at least a small portion for the next in line.

Motherless kittens cuddle with compliant surrogates, who are not much older than kittens, themselves. One cat, Cleopa, has allowed me to partly domesticate her, and she leaves food on her plate in the kitchen, knowing that Ill place the remains outdoors for her pals.

My mother prodded and poked her three children like we were pin cushions until saying please, thank you, pardon me, and Im sorry were reflexes. And I have to say, while it was a painful learning experience, it was one of the most valuable.

I cant tell you how often I sat with my friends, eating at their dinner tables, while their parents raved about my social graces. While it was a little embarrassing, I knew even then that my mothers teachings were paying off.

Decades later, when I was disseminating my seminars across the country, my manners really came in handy, and they were honed in places like Texas, Florida, Georgia, and the Midwest, where moms everywhere are still prodding their youngsters to show respect and consideration for others.

While I regret that I havent been a perfect exemplar, Im still working on it. I suppose, in this regard, my mother lives on through me.

I didnt inherit her beautiful singing voice or her green eyes, but she did make sure I received one of her finest characteristics.

Thank you, Mom, for the good manners!

Dr. Gary S. Goodman 2005